| Oct. 2013 | | Dear Cosmo Girls, | This week is all about Disney Princesses and oral sex.
If I were a Disney Princess, I would be Ariel. It follows that my fiance would be Prince Eric, and not just because he'd rather not wear a tie, but really because he loves jogging outdoors in the fall in barefoot shoes and would totally drive any girl who didn't know how to use her legs (AKA me on a few too many margaritas) around in a horse-drawn wagon.
Love is the best. Especially when it's honest. And by "honest" I mean, when you don't have to pretend you love blowing a man just in order to get something equitable in return — the sad state of society's grand oral sex exchange among straights these days, as Cosmopolitan.com's Anna Breslaw quite expertly and controversially articulates.
We are trained from a very young age to idolize the notion of being saved by a more able — often carriage driving-competent — man. But what's more compelling now is the idea that all women need saving from is the expectation that they'll be as conformist to straight male whims as porn stars, and as idealistic of their modern adult relationships as screenwriters of fairy tales they're trained to idolize. Not to mention, a total rejection of "Slutoween." If you're still searching for a costume, grab a friend and dress as Daft Punk and enjoy being the most popular people in the room every time "Get Lucky" plays. If all your friends are booked, get a full furry costume and surprise everyone by being a straight-up bear. No one expects to find a chick inside one of those things.
Just remember that sometimes, the best moves in life are the ones no one saw coming.
Amy Odell
Editor of Cosmopolitan.com |  | | |
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